A SOLDIER'S STORY
Adapting
By
Franke Gracia
When preparing for this deployment, I harbored secret hopes for a relatively uneventful mission. Those hopes were dashed as soon as we hit country.
I’ve had to adapt. It’s amazing what you can get used to . . . when you have to.
I’m now used to the fact that there are no weekends in a war zone. Saturday is the same as Tuesday, or Friday, or any other day of the week. I’m used to Zulu time now, and the regularity of fourteen to sixteen hour workdays. In fact, the sergeant I work with the closest, at the end of our marathon days, simply bids me a weary “see you in a few hours sir” as he slowly shuffles off to his hooch. We’re both used to it now.
I’m now used to taking my malaria pill every night before I collapse in my bunk, although I did have to modify that ritual. Since the days all run together over here, I would routinely end my day standing in a dazed, exhausted stupor, staring at a malaria pill in my open palm, wondering to myself, “Did I already take my pill . . . or was that yesterday?” I solved his quandary with a calendar. When I take my pill I simply cross off that day. That way I don’t get confused, I don’t overdo my prescribed medication, and I significantly reduce my risk of contracting malaria.
And at night, during my precious few hours of sleep, I am now completely accustomed to having to get dressed . . . for my trek to the latrine. I’m sure when I return to civilian life, and the urge hits me in the middle of the night, I will automatically reach for my boots . . . to go to the bathroom.
I’m used to plenty of things now. Like taking my weapon to chow and to the latrine, signs reminding me I live in an area contaminated with land mines and unexploded ordnance, signs in the gym reminding me to “Get Tough or Die,” the “Big Voice” announcing another controlled detonation, the building shaking and windows rattling when it happens, and radio traffic referring to “Preacher 1,” “Band Aid, Band Aid,” “How Copy,” “Good Copy,” “Alamo 1” and “Charlie Foxtrot.”
I’m not even fazed anymore at the Warthogs, C-130s, C-17s, Chinooks, Blackhawks and various other military aircraft buzzing around me all day long. And the unbelievably loud A6 jets no longer wake me up in the middle of the night. I sleep right through them.
What I can’t get used to is the cold. I’m not ever going to get used to the uncontrollable shivering, chattering teeth, and seeing my breath visibly condense in front of me before I shower, during my shower, and after my shower. I’m never going to get used to purposely standing in the back blast of a jet engine . . . just to try to stay warm.
On a recent mission I hugged the rugged mountains of Ghazni province in a Blackhawk helicopter. The scenery was unbelievable. I didn’t care. I was too cold to care. I just kept moving my fingers and toes every few minutes . . . so they could hurt . . . so I could be glad . . . because that meant they were still there. Between these episodes, I kept hallucinating about palm trees, citrus orchards, and the warm, sandy beaches of my native Rio Grande Valley.
Not long ago, my life used to be semesters, class schedules, functions, exams, quadratic equations, faculty meetings and office hours. Now my life revolves around the 3 and 4 shop, blue force trackers, log cell snafus, staff meetings, roger this and roger that, Army regs, security missions, operations orders, armored convoys, air ops, rocket attacks, who got it, praying it wasn’t any of our guys, then feeling guilty for the guys that did get hit – they’ve got families too.
I’ve had to get used to a lot here in Afghanistan. When I go home, I don’t ever want to get used to waking up in America and doing what far too many Americans do – taking it for granted. I hope I get used to accepting it for what it truly is – Christmas, 365 days a year.
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Franke Gracia lives in Temple, Texas and was deployed in Afghanistan with the National Guard from May 2005 to April 2006. He is a math professor at Temple College and is very close to his family that includes two brothers and two sisters. He earned a bronze star while he was deployed, which he gave to his mother. As to why he decided to write this series of articles he says, "I hope folks who read my scribbling will gain a greater appreciation of what a citizen-soldier goes through during a deployment."